A Father's Love

I cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father's protection.
- Sigmund Freud

Any man can be a Father but it takes someone special to be a dad.
- Anne Geddes

Unfortunately, it has become "the norm" for young men to have more child support bills than tuition debt. The age-old tradition of growing up, settling down with a wife and then having children is not as popular as it once was. Many young people are becoming parents long before they are ready--financially, mentally, emotionally and otherwise.

Once you get past the pregnancy part, there are many young mothers who are left behind without the father in the picture. Too many little girls and boys grow up confused, unidentified, misidentified and angry. The saddest part is that many of them don't understand why, and probably never will.

Not every young woman is left with a child and "baby daddy" issues, though. There are some young people who have taken responsibility for the life they brought into this world and are doing the best they can to be great parents for their children.

Darren West Jr is a father and a dad. He is not only setting an example for his beautiful daughter by working hard as a student at Millikin University and an employed lab technician, but he spends the invaluable quality time with his baby girl.

Sure, not every young parent is able to have the help and support of family when in school and caring for his/her child, but where there is a will, there is a way. I have personally seen many young parents make it through with and without help from others.

Darren is not the statistic. He beats the odds of today's average young black male father. He is present by choice, and his daughter will know who she is and who she has the potential to become.

 It is with much faith, prayer, sacrifice, dedication and perseverance that his family--daughter and fiance--will be strong, healthy and prosperous.

There is Hope

I'm not one to talk about race. As far as I'm concerned, there is only one race and that's the human race. Many people look at me and see that I am a black woman. When I look at myself in the mirror, however, I see Christal. I see a beautiful woman, flawed and imperfect, but loving and earnest, kind, thoughtful and wise. And, of course, a goofball.

In watching the news, I see that many of the crimes and murders in Chicago are allegedly committed by men in the "black race." If there were such a thing, I am tired of seeing black men in handcuffs and in jail. I watched a news cast recently that showed a precinct that was EIGHT people away from a capacity of 10,000. This news reporter took cameras into the prison and allowed viewers to see many incarcerated men. Most of them were black. Many of them were smiling. I was horrified.

On one hand, one could stretch the imagination to believe that maybe being in jail is better than being loose and unprotected on the streets. But on a larger, meatier hand with ridiculously long fingernails, one should see that portraying prison as a place of blissful refuge is not only oxymoronic (yes, it's a word. look it up for yourself :), but it is also a definite way to diminish the dreams of young black hopefuls, making them think that jail is not so bad and, perhaps, inevitable.

But, there is hope.

The silver lining in this story is that not all young black men are prison-prone. Take Kevin Hall Jr. for instance. This good-looking, intelligent and creative young man is a sophomore in college, writing and taking amazing pictures that are regularly published in The Daily Eastern News (Eastern Illinois University).

Kevin has passion, vision and the faith needed to succeed. Born and raised in Chicago, IL, Kevin is a black man with an education, talent, outstanding work ethic, and perseverance.  He will be successful and there's no doubt about that. And it's not because he grew up in a sheltered neighborhood, or was fed with a silver spoon his entire life. He is no stranger to struggle and adversity. He just chose to defy the odds and destroy the stereotypes.

I don't believe in races, but if there is such a thing, there is hope for the black race after all.